Now THAT is funny!

 

One morning I was on line looking at pics of a boneyard for classics out west somewhere. My daughter (9) walks up and asks me what I am looking at. I told her "I am looking at Olsmobiles on this cool website." She replied " Why are you doing that Daddy, when you have one in the garage that you can look at?"

Kids. Females.

 

Comment from wife when we picked up my 48 Olds in Oklahoma. "Okie hunk of junk car". Hurt my fellings, I told her wait until I am done with it. Yesterday she said I'm still waiting.

 

I was driving home late one night with the windows down. At a light a cab pulls up next to me. Some drunk guy hangs out the back window and says "man nice car, my buddy had the same car" I smiled and said thanks. Then he said "what ya got in it, a 440" I just laughed and hit it. LOL
_________________

 

Almost every person who tries to get out of my car yanks the handle straight towards them. Some of them even tell me the door is locked until I tell them to pull straight up.

 

Driving down broad st in philly w/ my girlfriend and a guy pulls up next to my window on a bicycle: How much for the car man!? 3,000? 3,050? Me: um... no. Dude...: how 'bout the girl? how much for the girl!? Me: ... ....wow *burns*

 

My boss wanted to go for a ride. He got in and I just nailed it. It must have been a religious experience for him because all he said was

 

OUCH

 

I hear all the time "Nice Delta"....Or "I had a Delta 88 that year".. Someone asked me if it was an Canadian car. Most people don't remember the Delmont 88. My favorite of all time was from a man who said he "Owned one back in the day and that he loved his "Dewmont"

 

My father, mother, ---------fill in the blank had one just like it!

My license plate frames read: No You Didn't Have One Just Like It!

 

Two things I always heard, from multiple people and usually women....

"My parents had a Cutlass/Olds, it had the best heater!"

As above but "it had really good pickup"

"I love that color!" (Viking Blue '70 OAI Vert w/ white "W" Stripes, pearl interior & white roof

 

We went to my wife's boss's home for a company BBQ and her boss says to me ''did you see that Lincoln on the road out there?' And I said "Where?" looking out on the street. He says "Right there. The Blue one." I answered back. That's not a Lincoln, it's an Olds." He then retorted "It's a Lincoln. I KNOW my cars!" I responded, "Well, here's the keys, I drive an Olds and it's Blue." I had to go out and show him that the keys were for "that blue Lincoln", in fact a Blue 63 Olds 98 Convertible. And no, I didn't give him a ride.

 

I always get "is that your Cadillac parked out there?" with my 66 Cutlass convertible

 

Hey I don't have a 442 and I want to stangle people when they say that.

 

ASking "what year is your car", and I have the year on the vanity plate.
Also calling my Toronad a Riv or Edlo.

 

Some zit faced punks in a Jap car with a fart can muffler pulled up beside me at a red light and asked me if my Olds was fast. "yep!" was all I said. They said " prove it" and I responded that she did not have to prove it anymore that I knew and that was enough. They took off laughing with a pathetic little bark of the tires and that lawnmower without a muffler sound. They did the same thing at the next light but I was waiting for them at the next one! They were conspicuously silent. I asked them if the would bring their Japasaki over and mow my yard.

 

 

I had a guy come up to my 442 and comment on what nice shape it was in. We were having a pretty good conversation, and I said that as I traced the history of the car through the six previous owners, it sounded as if they all took great care of it. To which he said..."So you're the original owner?"....I was speechless for a bit, then repeated what I just said to little avail...

 

Car is a 1974 Omega..

Actually I get more "NICE 442" or "what year cutlass is that".. rather than Nice nova comments.. Maybe because the yellow/black striping and the olds color matched rally wheels..

But I do get the "Thats a nice Nova" on occasion.

I did get from one guy. "That's a nice Duster" THAT MADE ME PISSED.. Those are borderline fighting words..

 

While staring at my '62 Olds Starfire, a couple of teenagers asked me if I had a big block in my Chevy. Another guy told me if I decided to sell my Olds, he could use it in the next demolition derby at the state fair. ( urge to kill). Sadly, he's the same guy who had recently used a rather nice '53 Olds in the state demolition derby. ( another urge to kill). One of my more pleasant moments while driving my car, however, came when a man pulled up next to me, honked his horn, and gave me a " thumbs up" sign. To my surprise, he was driving a '62 Olds Starfire just like mine !

 

i just had a new one. i was at the gas station and car wash getting ready for the nationals. i had my 91 Quad 442 W-41. a guy asked me about the car because he had not seen one before. he commented "it's hard to believe they crammed a 442 cubic inch engine in that little car". he added that a friend had a 442 cubic inch engine out of an old GTO. i couldn't say anything after all that. i just nodded and went my way.

 

i just remembered another one. a year or so ago i was looking at a super 88. the guy told me it had a 350 super rocket in it. after looking under the hood i found that it had a 425 in it. i noticed right away i did not want the car so i told him that he should tell people that it had a 425 not a 350 because the 425 will be more desirable than the 350. he insisted that it was a 350 super rocket. i showed him my engine in my rallye 350 to show him that the 425 was wider than a 350. he said that the 350 super rocket was wider than the regular 350 or even the rocket 350. i guess i learn something new every day. i did not know that olds made 3 differant 350 engines.

 

I get "nice Cadillac" all the time on the Toronado, which is excusable because it really does kind of look like an Eldorado (if it's dark out and raining and you're high) but the funniest is when people ask if the wagon is a Cadillac.

A guy I work with insists that my wagon has a Cadillac dash and door handles (those actually may be)

 

I always liked the 3/4 cam statement, I always respond, " next time get the whole thing it will run better" and just walk away!

 

My kids didn't know how to roll the windows down in my car either. After they figured it out, up ,down, up, down. The side vent windows were their favorite though.

 

Man do I feel Old! (not Olds but Old!) I went to the gas station and the attendant walked around the car then said "where's the gas tank" When I told him behind the license plate he said "What?"

Remember when.... the 1957 Chebby had the gas filler behind one of the tail lights? When I was in high school those were considered clunkers! John

 

man now I feel old, I remember attendants

 

I always get funny looks when I lift up the taillight bezel to put gas in my 57. People ask me if I hid the gas cap there on purpose. I get the "is that a cadillac thing as well and little kids like the wing window cranks as well

 

It seems every time I take my car out someone asks me if I want to sell it. And they are usually driving some pile-o-junk and couldn't afford it if I were asking $1000 for it.
I get the occasional "that got a four fourty two in it?" and I have to do everything I can not to give em a "Moe slap".

 

"Nice car....... what is it?"
"Hansome..Cadillac!
"Big Chervolet"
-Little boys says "Wow!" and "Big car"....
And cas station owners like me and my olds...

 

At my first car show Wednesday.....lottsa nice Olds [and the usual Chebby's ]. "Just cleared puberty" Clearasil "before" kids walk around my 69 442 post , and the smart one says to his dumb and dumber friend..."you wouldn't BELIEVE the money these Mopar cars are getting at Barrett-Jackson "!!

 

I try not to be a smartass until I know you, but one day a guy stopped me at the gas station and asked about my obviously unfinished project, "are you restoring it?" I gave him a smirk and a "Ya know, Oldsmobiles restore themselves".

 

I had a sign on my rear side window that said For Sale $18000 ...

A lot of people wanted to buy it...













for $1800 ...

 

The funniest thing anyone ever said to me was when I was getting gas in my '51 88-A, an old guy in his 80's came up to me and said: "Olds rocket 88- I had one of them once -It could pass anything but a gas station". His second remark was "I called it the RACKET 88".
His first joke I didn't get since my Olds gets fairly good mileage compaired to other antique cars I've owned. For you young guys- The 2nd joke holds some truths as the first Rocket v/8's had problems with lifter noise for a couple of years (1949-50).

 

I had a little Jap Car with some Chumps in it doing a weed eater Rev on me a while back at a Light. I told them I would be happy to Race them but I wouldn't have time to disconnect the 4 plugs and Remove the Cam to make it fair.

 

I remember them long ago in TX... LONG AGO...
This brings back a fond memory during a northwest coast vacation in October 2003.
Heading north on 101, I pulled into a gas station in little Brookings, OR, just over the state line.
I recorded my mileage, dug out my charge card and hopped out to fill up. As soon as I did, i was right in the face of a cute middle aged lady, who had the biggest smile, asking "What can I do for you?"
After what seemed to be an eternal 5 seconds, many things racing through my mind, she asked regular or premium? I was really wanting to say something now! About 3 seconds later, it dawned on me that in Oregon you are not allowed to pump your own gas - attendents only!
I knew Oregon was great, and at first I thought it had a surprise for this single guy!

 

that is funny. i was in NJ several years ago and tried to fill up the car. a kid in plane clothes started to yell at me when i tried to start the pump. i did not know what the heck was going on. i just kept going. he then threatened to call the cops on me if i did not put the pump handle down. about that time the manager came out and told us that you can't pump your own gas in NJ. i told the manager that they need uniforms for there gas attendants.

 

Or cute smiling ladies that will take away your every thought about pumping gas...

 

Thats right, In N.J. you must have a station pump your gas- Then why is gas always 15-30 cents cheaper in N.J. than it is here in Ct ?. Could it be goverment B.S., regulations, taxes. Also when I fill up in the Delaware / Maryland area, not only is the gas cheaper, my gas mileage goes up 2-3 MPG. It's all because of government nonsense- and now they want to run healthcare !.

 

As odd as this sounds, i've had about 5 people in their 50's come accross parking lots to me & say they love the car and they learned to drive in their mom's car that was exactly like it.

They all knew it was a 66 cutlass (although to be fair one guy said he learned in a Burgandy 67). Just thought that was odd...

Other than those folks, i notice a lot of people craning their necks as i go by to look at it- with that "what is that" look on their faces... A few people have come up to look at it and said "AHHH- its a CUTLASS!" when they see the emblems.

Nice having something different!