The Stranger
January 12th, 2011, 02:14 PM
#1
...should get a life....
Thread Starter
Join Date: Aug 2009
Location: Orangeville, NSW, Australia
Posts: 717
The Stranger
Got this via email from a friend. How true it is
The Stranger
Years after I was born, my Dad met a stranger who was new to our
small town. From the beginning, Dad was fascinated with this enchanting
newcomer and soon invited him to live with our family. The stranger was
quickly accepted and was around from then on.
As I grew up, I never questioned his place in my family. In my
young mind, he had a special niche. My parents were complementary
instructors: Mum taught me good from evil, and Dad taught me to obey. But
the stranger... he was our storyteller. He would keep us spellbound for
hours on end with adventures, mysteries and comedies.
If I wanted to know anything about politics, history or science,
he always knew the answers about the past, understood the present and even
seemed able to predict the future! He took my family to the first major
league ball game. He made me laugh, and he made me cry. The stranger never
stopped talking, but Dad didn't seem to mind.
Sometimes, Mum would get up quietly while the rest of us were
shushing each other to listen to what he had to say, and she would go to the
kitchen for peace and quiet.
(I wonder now if she ever prayed for the stranger to leave.)
Dad ruled our household with certain moral convictions, but the
stranger never felt obligated to honour them. Profanity, for example, was
not allowed in our home - not from us, our friends or any visitors. Our
long time visitor, however, got away with four-letter words that burned my
ears and made my dad squirm and my mother blush. My Dad didn't permit the
liberal use of alcohol but the stranger encouraged us to try it on a regular
basis. He made cigarettes look cool, cigars manly, and pipes distinguished.
He talked freely (much too freely!) about sex. His comments were sometimes
blatant, sometimes suggestive, and generally embarrassing..
I now know that my early concepts about relationships were
influenced strongly by the stranger. Time after time, he opposed the values
of my parents, yet he was seldom rebuked... And NEVER asked to leave.
More than fifty years have passed since the stranger moved in
with our family. He has blended right in and is not nearly as fascinating as
he was at first. Still, if you could walk into my parents' den today, you
would still find him sitting over in his corner, waiting for someone to
listen to him talk and watch him draw his pictures.
His name???
We just call him "TV." I really fear what his grandkids will be
like.
He has a wife now...we call her "Computer."
Their first child is "Cell Phone."
Second child "I Pod."
The Stranger
Years after I was born, my Dad met a stranger who was new to our
small town. From the beginning, Dad was fascinated with this enchanting
newcomer and soon invited him to live with our family. The stranger was
quickly accepted and was around from then on.
As I grew up, I never questioned his place in my family. In my
young mind, he had a special niche. My parents were complementary
instructors: Mum taught me good from evil, and Dad taught me to obey. But
the stranger... he was our storyteller. He would keep us spellbound for
hours on end with adventures, mysteries and comedies.
If I wanted to know anything about politics, history or science,
he always knew the answers about the past, understood the present and even
seemed able to predict the future! He took my family to the first major
league ball game. He made me laugh, and he made me cry. The stranger never
stopped talking, but Dad didn't seem to mind.
Sometimes, Mum would get up quietly while the rest of us were
shushing each other to listen to what he had to say, and she would go to the
kitchen for peace and quiet.
(I wonder now if she ever prayed for the stranger to leave.)
Dad ruled our household with certain moral convictions, but the
stranger never felt obligated to honour them. Profanity, for example, was
not allowed in our home - not from us, our friends or any visitors. Our
long time visitor, however, got away with four-letter words that burned my
ears and made my dad squirm and my mother blush. My Dad didn't permit the
liberal use of alcohol but the stranger encouraged us to try it on a regular
basis. He made cigarettes look cool, cigars manly, and pipes distinguished.
He talked freely (much too freely!) about sex. His comments were sometimes
blatant, sometimes suggestive, and generally embarrassing..
I now know that my early concepts about relationships were
influenced strongly by the stranger. Time after time, he opposed the values
of my parents, yet he was seldom rebuked... And NEVER asked to leave.
More than fifty years have passed since the stranger moved in
with our family. He has blended right in and is not nearly as fascinating as
he was at first. Still, if you could walk into my parents' den today, you
would still find him sitting over in his corner, waiting for someone to
listen to him talk and watch him draw his pictures.
His name???
We just call him "TV." I really fear what his grandkids will be
like.
He has a wife now...we call her "Computer."
Their first child is "Cell Phone."
Second child "I Pod."
January 12th, 2011, 10:12 PM
#5
Registered User
Join Date: Jan 2008
Location: Sherwood Park, Alberta
Posts: 2,623
Well, here's an email I received and it's true too.
Sexand Good Grammar
On his 74th birthday, a man got a gift certificate from his wife. The certificate paid for a visit to a medicine man living on a nearby reservation who was rumored to have a wonderful cure for erectile dysfunction.
After being persuaded, he drove to the reservation, handed his ticket to the medicine man, and wondered what he was in for.
The old man handed a potion to him and, with a grip on his shoulder, warned, "This is a powerful medicine. You take only a teaspoonful and then say '1-2-3'." When you do, you will become more manly than you have ever been in your life and you can perform as long as you want."
The man was encouraged. As he walked away, he turned and asked, "How do I stop the medicine from working?" "Your partner must say '1-2-3-4'," he responded, "but when she does, the medicine will not work again until the next full moon."
He was very eager to see if it worked, so he went home, showered, shaved, took a spoonful of the medicine, and then invited his wife to join him in the bedroom. When she came in, he took off his clothes and said, "1-2-3!" Immediately he was the manliest of men.
His wife was excited and began throwing off her clothes and then she asked, "What was the 1-2-3 for?"
And that, boys and girls, is why we should never end our sentences with a preposition, because we could end up with a dangling participle.
Sexand Good Grammar
On his 74th birthday, a man got a gift certificate from his wife. The certificate paid for a visit to a medicine man living on a nearby reservation who was rumored to have a wonderful cure for erectile dysfunction.
After being persuaded, he drove to the reservation, handed his ticket to the medicine man, and wondered what he was in for.
The old man handed a potion to him and, with a grip on his shoulder, warned, "This is a powerful medicine. You take only a teaspoonful and then say '1-2-3'." When you do, you will become more manly than you have ever been in your life and you can perform as long as you want."
The man was encouraged. As he walked away, he turned and asked, "How do I stop the medicine from working?" "Your partner must say '1-2-3-4'," he responded, "but when she does, the medicine will not work again until the next full moon."
He was very eager to see if it worked, so he went home, showered, shaved, took a spoonful of the medicine, and then invited his wife to join him in the bedroom. When she came in, he took off his clothes and said, "1-2-3!" Immediately he was the manliest of men.
His wife was excited and began throwing off her clothes and then she asked, "What was the 1-2-3 for?"
And that, boys and girls, is why we should never end our sentences with a preposition, because we could end up with a dangling participle.
January 12th, 2011, 10:35 PM
#6
The television one is oh so true.My mothers uncle worked for bell labs developing television in the early days.He said that if he knew what it would be used for,he wouldn't have bothered.I work in television at times,and try to make something of quality and worth.There is not much of a market for it,folks have grown to accept crap,and the execs have caught on.I rarely ever watch it myself.And now I have to be worried about counting!
Fortunately,we usually count backwards in tv and movies!
---bil
Fortunately,we usually count backwards in tv and movies! ---bil
January 13th, 2011, 02:11 PM
#8
...should get a life....
Thread Starter
Join Date: Aug 2009
Location: Orangeville, NSW, Australia
Posts: 717
The television one is oh so true.My mothers uncle worked for bell labs developing television in the early days.He said that if he knew what it would be used for,he wouldn't have bothered.I work in television at times,and try to make something of quality and worth.There is not much of a market for it,folks have grown to accept crap,and the execs have caught on.I rarely ever watch it myself.And now I have to be worried about counting! Fortunately,we usually count backwards in tv and movies! ---bil
Fortunately,we usually count backwards in tv and movies! ---bilSeems every second channel down here has some kind of cooking show "Iron Chef, Master Chef, Food Safari, Poh's Kitchen, Jamie Whatsit, Celebrity Chef" etc etc etc......or bloody dancing shows. Not too often you get to watch something that you take something positive away from.
January 13th, 2011, 05:54 PM
#9
The problem was accelerated by the writers strike several years ago.No scripted shows were made during that time,and the studios started to shoot the 'reality' shows,as supposedly they were unscripted.Then they realised that people would actually watch them.And that other people were willing to make a$$es of themselves on TV for FREE!!! That really set them off,there were a few of these shows before,many now.
The problem becomes than few of the bean-counters want to spend money on quality programing when cheap junk will do.They figured out that once someone plopped down on the couch,they would watch whatever was on.Mindless pap. It become a choice of not what do I WANT to watch,but one of what is least objectionable. There are some really good shows being made,but the cheap junk proliferates. Television has discovered the Wal-Mart business model,but it doesn't really work for them.They just haven't realised it yet. ---bil
The problem becomes than few of the bean-counters want to spend money on quality programing when cheap junk will do.They figured out that once someone plopped down on the couch,they would watch whatever was on.Mindless pap. It become a choice of not what do I WANT to watch,but one of what is least objectionable. There are some really good shows being made,but the cheap junk proliferates. Television has discovered the Wal-Mart business model,but it doesn't really work for them.They just haven't realised it yet. ---bil
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