Octania

I have a supervisor who feels the need to tell me HOW [like, EXACTLY how...] to so stuff, rather than WHAT to do.

He is also abusive and demeaning, to the point where several others have said to me "does he always talk to you like that?"

I have taken concerns to HR and for a week it was a bit better, but now it's back and worse than before.

Anyone have an issue like this, care to offer guidance?

I do have that engineering degree and 30 yrs' experience doing stuff, so I think I know *how* to do my job.

BangScreech4-4-2

Is anybody else in the workplace having problems with him or is it just you?

pavemobile

Ask him politely, "Are you trying to create a hostile work environment?"


That should at least get his attention. But...if this person does your eval's you might get the short straw.

RandyS

I have always operated with the philosophy that 'Honesty is the best policy'. The next time it happens, point out to him nicely the exact thing he did, and how it made you feel. Do this in private so he doesn't feel challenged in public. If it continues, tell him more forcefully, if that doesn't do it, go to his superior with specific examples (video would be best).

Professur

Your problem is you're perceived as a nice guy. I'm actively perceived as an *******. I never have problems like this.

I suggest only one thing. Next time he tries to tell you HOW to do your job ... ask him why you're employed there if he doesn't think you're qualified. That usually serves to back them off initially. Then remind him ... You're there to do a job. He's there to make sure you have the tools to make sure the job is done .. not to tell you how. If you've screwed up in the past and now need your hand held, there should be write ups in your HR file about it. Why weren't you informed they were there? He needs to go get them and you'll meet him in his office to discuss them. There aren't any? Then what the hell does he think he's doing??

Did I mention I'm known as an *******? Best in my field .. but you really don't want to be in my personal space ... and I take a whole lot of space.

don71

Keep a journal with just the facts about this behavior.

When and if the nice guy approach doesn't work you'll still have the basic facts. Be a good record keeper. He might be doing it as well and part of his job.

You don't have to use this info but it might be nice to have at the right time.

If company policy is being broken, it needs to be reported asap. don't wait.

oldcutlass

Seems to me a new job is in order. You've been complaining for how many years now about this place?

Koda

Record the conversations and fire back sarcasm at him. Decide if the job is more important, or winning the battle. If the job is more important, do nothing other than record the conversations and go straight to HR. Once done, he cannot retaliate else he gets in more trouble. If telling him off is more important, record them, and let fly.

"Yeah, I've done this before."
"I was doing this when you were in elementary school."
"This isn't my first rodeo."
"You want to hold my hand while I do it, too?"
"I could've been done by now if you hadn't wasted all this time explaining it again."
"Those who can, do; those who can't, manage those who can."

oldcutlass

That last statement will get you fired, don't ask me how I know...

z11375ss

Tell him his sister likes it this way.

kitfoxdave

Or go to Contract Job Hunter, and become a contractor... make boatloads more money and NEVER have to put up with this BS ever again!. Christmas card with a picture of your new bigger house, new truck, nice Oldsmobile, new boat, new plane... and wish him happy holidays!

kitfoxdave

The exit strategy is kind of like this... in the group meeting give a presentation on the problem you have been developing the fix for, explain to him exactly where things went wrong with the existing design... show him the best solution to keep the liability of the company to a minimum, lay out the costs for the solution and how long it will take to implement. At the end of this presentation, explain that you enjoyed the chance to work out the solution to this problem, and wish the company good luck in its implementation. you will be joining another company at a very significant increase in compensation in two weeks. Keep it classy and professional, but laugh on the inside as his face goes white and he holds his head in his hands... You will feel MUCH better! Been there done that!

jensenracing77

Not sure I can help but I do agree with documenting every bad experience. Even if you do it on your own time. I had a bad apple at work that I worked side by side with. after 2 years I had enough of his crap and took it up with the owner. When we all sit down the owner ask me for details. While on the spot I could not think of anything. Needless to say, nothing got done after that meeting. another year had went by and I documented every issue I had. We ended up in another meeting and my documentation was so detailed that the other guy could not dispute it. He ended up being moved to another location where he worked by himself. Just be very accurate in the exact words used and document it the same day to avoid errors.

redoldsman

Unfortunately this things are rarely resolved without somebody leaving. I have seen a few instances where the person was just a bully until somebody stood up to them as is the case with most bullies. It is unfortunate but a nice job can change to a nightmare with the change of one person. Good luck on this one.

Intragration

If I was in this position today and was otherwise in good standing with the company, I'd first make it clear to this guy that I was perfectly capable and qualified to do the job that he was micromanaging me on, and ask him to stop. You might have to follow this up a couple times, maybe with a canned response. "You're micromanaging again..." Something like this. Strangely, if you do this in a friendly way, it might work, and you might even get on this guy's good side.

If this doesn't work, or if he's just a pure jerk, I would start documenting every time this happens. Do it openly, in front of him, making sure to log the amount of time he's wasting by telling you what you already know. Then if he asks, you can explain what you're doing. This will probably annoy the hell out of him, but you can explain that you take your job seriously, and that you're having a hard time doing it efficiently with all the interruptions. You can then go to HR or the next level of management, with a plan for increasing you/your department's efficiency.

Of course, as soon as you start this process, you're putting your job in potential jeopardy. But from the sounds of it, your options are to quit, to put up with it silently, or to do something about it. You might be surprised at how upper management appreciates someone who is willing to stick their neck out because they want to do their job more efficiently. (NOT complaining. Never ever. Time/money-saving ideas only!) Worst case, you lose your job, which you might have quit anyway. But this can also be fun, especially if you get the sign that management is with you. Pushing the micromanager's buttons and watching him lose his mind can be extremely satisfying if done for the right reasons. Ask me how I know.

BangScreech4-4-2

Okay, I'll bite -- how do you know?

Octania

Tyhanks, guys
will update later
I have been documenting lostly because I have a poor memory.

Told him flat out via e-mail about a week ago to stop micro-managing me
no response yet

m371961

I always told them to go away, I will ask for help if I need it and let them know when I am finished. Worked for me.

oldcutlass

Don't you think that this conversation should be face to face?

boese1978

e-mail does = a "paper" trial............

BangScreech4-4-2

Better than a jury trial ...

Boldsmobile

micro manage like the time you told me how to package something before shipping? not realizing once in my career i was product design engineer responsible for package design and passing transit testing.




is his way wrong, different or better?


id like to know more about why you disagree. examples?