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Germany or the tale of automotive experts

Old December 6th, 2018, 09:41 AM
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Germany or the tale of automotive experts


owning now my Cutlass for 3 years there happened so many funny things to me, I have to share them with you.
Germanys economic power is based on one product. Cars. Every 2nd job in my country is related to cars, so I thought -maybe my young age of 48 might excuse- that I live in a country full of automotive experts. At least every second should be one....

Ok, lets start. Somewhere when my Olds was quiete new to me I stood in front of a traffic light. A guy crossed the street and said: hey man, nice us car, which brand? I said: thanks man, it is an Oldsmobile. He said: oh well yes, I can see that, but what brand? Well. He was number one , following statistics the next guy will be an automotive super-expert.
Few weeks later I was at the gas station. Guy came by and said: hey man, nice car, i know the brand but which model is ist? Oh, i was happy with that, at least OLDSMOBILE is written in 2m on the trunk, and hey, this guy can read and he knows Olds. Great! So I said: thanks sir, it is an cutlass. He said: hah, i knew that this chevy is not the model „oldsmobile“, i was just wondering why you didnt put OLDTIMER on the trunk. Ok, he was number two, maybe the
This year I was with a friend of mine at Oldtimer meeting. He has a beautiful 58er 88. I guess you all might guess what comes next. Yep, a guy came and said....hey man, beautiful cadillac. So,my friend said, no Cadillac, it is an Oldsmobile 88. Ah, the guy said, ok, what does that 88 stand for? My friend said: i am not sure, but there was something like 8cylinders and 8foot length. And there was also a 98.....the guy stated immediateley: oh, i guess this was a 9 cylinder. Gentlemen, i was at an OLDTIMER meeting. Unbelievable.

So I decided for myself that yes, we do cars, but no, no one knows anyhing about cars older then one week, but hey, who cares. What happened today destroyed this last resort. Since I renewed the tank on my CS fuel is leaking when it is more then half full. So I decided to take it off again to check where it is leaking. There have been just a few liters left in the tank, as I swapped it to an electric fuel pump I disconnected the fuel line at the carb, extended it 1m, put the end in a canister and turned ignition on. So I was standing in the front of my car, hood open, a canister in my hand, when my neighbour came from work and asked me: hey, why are you fueling up your car manually? He is Dr. ing. at the Ford Company in Köln, head of development exterieur. And no, he was not kidding.

-end of tale-
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Old December 6th, 2018, 10:17 AM
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Wait til they try to find the dealership
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Old December 6th, 2018, 11:30 AM
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Very cool stories. Thanks for sharing.
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Old December 6th, 2018, 11:46 AM
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Good humor and well told!

Thanks for sharing the fun.
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Old December 6th, 2018, 07:42 PM
Oh no, not again...
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Location: Sherwood Park, Alberta, in the Great White North
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Na Sowas!!

Hard to believe, no, actually it isn' dad was a German trained mechanical engineer who used to regale us with stories of how smart he was and make us feel like idiots as I was growing up. Then came the day when he was standing there, car not running, looking at the motor with the hood up. I told him that I thought there was a loose wire, ( I was about 10) and he stood there, called me an idiot and explained to me how hard it would be to trouble shoot this system and that system. When the tow truck driver came out, he took a quick look, plugged in the coil wire that had worked loose and then started the car. The look on the Old Man's face was priceless, and he was a bit sore forking over $50 for 10 seconds of work.

To this day my mother defers to me when it comes to cars and servicing them.
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Old December 6th, 2018, 10:29 PM
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My Dad loved his Oldsmobiles. He had a '55 "88", '57 "98", '58 "88" and then the '60 "88". My step brother called "the street sweeper". Now this came about because when he wanted to show off for the neighborhood kids, he would spin the tire (one wheel wonder) when pulling away from the curb. Well, the WHOOSH of that powerful 371 (low compression, 2 barrel, automatic, single exhaust) would blow all the dirt, and leaves from the gutter into the air.
Shortly after I got my drivers license, I would take the car without his permission when he was out of town and go cruising. Yes, I got caught because he memorized remembered the miles on the odometer. Sooooooo, I learned how to disconnect and reconnect the speedometer cable.
Next time we got caught because the gas gage wasn't where it was when he left. Sooooooo, we learned to refill the gas tank with enough gas to make the needle comeback to the exact place it was before we went cruising.
The funniest thing was when I learned we could remove the air cleaner lid and turn it over. We got that moaning sound when all 2 barrels were open and foot was on the floor. I am sure we impressed people with that sound. Well,anyway, we got home from cruising one night.......hooked up the speedometer cable, CHECK......checked gas gage to make sure read the same as when we left, CHECK. Off to bed we went.
The next day my Dad was home and leaving for work. All the kids in the neighborhood were yelling BURN RUBBER as he climbed in the car. SO, he fired up the engine, let it warm up a minute and BLASTED away from the curb, foot to the floor, leaves and dirt flying everywhere and one long black tire mark. He jammed on the brakes a half block down the street, jumped out and raised the hood............he thought he had blown up the engine. When he discovered the air cleaner lid had been turned over he calmed down, but HE WAS MAD !!!! I don't think he ever knew we forgot to turn it back over after a night of cruising. After that, he would raise the hood for a look from time to time.
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